Let Get Flicked

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What is a Fuzzball?

  • One question I hear more than any other is What's a Fuzzball??" Allow me to explain:

    A Fuzzball is a 30-year-old fallen debutante who lives in Houston, TX with a bossy dog and an even bossier parrot who she SWEARS is the reincarnation of Napoleon Bonaparte.

    A Fuzzball prefers animals to most people, because people can really suck sometimes.

    A Fuzzball loves music, ALL music ALL of the time. If she's not listening to it, then she's singing it.

    A Fuzzball has a mad love for all things British, especially their actors.

    A Fuzzball is blissfully happy in a bookstore, preferably one with good music playing in the background. If you look under a Fuzzball's bed you'll usually find an entire library of books that she has dropped there after falling asleep reading.

    Fuzzballs are usually incurable romantics, ridiculously optimistic, and bent on making the world a happier place.

    Your typical Fuzzball will probably have a completely bizarre sense of humor. Just go with it, it will take you to funny places.

    You should also be aware that Fuzzballs are giant nerds. Seriously. Science fiction, computers, the whole shebang.

    Fuzzballs are also budding photographers. They love looking at the world through a lens and finding new ways to be creative.

    Oh...and you can also look for a Fuzzball in one of the best movies ever made. ;)

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Unfourtuantely if you cannot get to anything, icons or otherwise, your options are limited.

First, from the deskptop just for s&gs hit Ctrl + Esc. That is the manual keystroke to bring up the task bar. If you can get to that, you might be able to do a few things, like get to the internet. McAfee offers a FreeScan program that will check for a bunch of viruses and will give you some ideas about manually cleaning the problem.

If you can get nothing, do you still have the software that came with your computer, sometimes they have a recovery disk that might help.

You can also try to get a boot up disk from McAfee or Notons virus system. McAfee is fairly cheap or if you know of somebody who has it make a copy.

Spyware isn't likely to be the casue of your problem. When you get the virus taken care of just install some good spyware software. I use SpyBot, but there are plenty of good options.


Oh, please, don't get me started about Dell, Dell technical support, and the piece-of-shit laptop I got from them that has to have the harddrive replaced once a year on average. I was lucky the first time it died; it was just a few months out of the box, under warrenty and I was talked through everything by these really cool laid-back guys in Austin who really knew their stuff. Since then, I've had some of the most stupid dialogues with their tech aupport. I knew I was in trouble when I know more about computers than the guy who's helping me.

I'm not enough of a geek to diagnose your problem, but I'm suspicious of his diagnosis of spyware/virus. Have you noticed your computer acting strange before now? Crashing? Running slow? Error messages? Have you gotten any attachments or downloaded any files the last time you were on the machine? I mean, you can't get a virus while you're offline.

Sorry I can't be more help. I feel for you. I really do. I've been through computer hell (and Dell hell) enough times that I flinch just thinking about it. :-(


Here's my suggestion: ditch your computer (save the monitor) and buy an apple mac mini. $500 bucks + about $30 for a monitor adapter, and you're set. I know shit about shit, especially when that shit = computers, but I have been informed that virus-related issues are virtually nonexistant when it comes to macs.


Happy and Blue

I had a similar problem once.
What you are going to need to fix it is a ski mask, preferably black, and a big heavy object like a brick.
Wear dark clothing and drive to the nearest computer store at night. Make sure there isn't a full moon.
Park a few blocks away and skulk to the store. If they have a window in back you have it made. If not move your car closer. You will need to get away fast.
Smash the window and run to the nearest computer. Did I mention you should check out the store before hand to find the best one. Well, if not do that first.
Anyways, grab the best computer you can and run like heck to your car.
Once you get home it shouldn't take long to set up your new computer.
One last thing. Never speak of what you did. To anyone.. Stupid squealers..
Hope that helps..


So, did you get the computer problem fixed? Or are you now blogging on a stolen computer? ;-)


Cheese it! The cops might be reading!

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