Daylight Savings sucks. That's not the point of this post, but I would just like to say that I absolutely detest the fact that it is dark outside as I am leaving work. What the fuck is that.
Last night as I was driving home I was so sleepy that I couldn't wait to get home and conk out in bed. I was listening to my darling K's Choice and the music was just perfect for my mood. When I pulled R2 up to my house I couldn't bear the thought of dragging myself out of the car and up the stairs and then down again with Emma and then up again, etc etc etc... So I turned the engine off but left the battery running the stereo, I leaned my seat all the way back and I sat in the darkness listening to music. I let the notes wash over me, I thought about each lyric, I thought about my day, my life, my friends, my family...it was this perfect moment of peace. It seemed like each song that played had some sort of significance to me, to how I was feeling, to what I needed to hear. I also thought about how oddly romantic the situation was -- lying back in a car seat in the darkness with soft music playing...but oops I was alone. Scratch the romance part. ;P
When the album ended I regretfully turned the car off, grabbed my gear and wandered upstairs to a VERY excited puppy. Later as I got in bed I turned the record on again to try to recapture my earlier peaceful moment, but it wasn't there. I don't know what was so different, I mean I was in the dark, it was the same music, and yet...no zen moment. So strange...
Maybe I just needed that ten or so minutes alone in my car, alone in the dark with K's Choice. Maybe that was the reset button that needed to be pushed. Who knows.
The hum of the drive, the lack of scenery, that's the sort of thing that mattered. I'm sure. I get that way sometimes. There are days when I'd be perfectly happy sitting in the garage parked just listening to a cd, singing or not singing but just being there, comfortable and alone. Luckily we'll all have those moments again, we just don't know when...
Posted by: Tirzah | November 07, 2007 at 06:36 PM
R2, I'm assuming, is your car? Even taking into account the name of this blog I'm still not sure what to do with that.
Posted by: Chris Thilk | November 07, 2007 at 08:45 PM
@Chris: *sigh* Yes, the car is R2-D2. It's a small silver Civic and the horn is a wee beep just like R2, so the car just named itself. :D
Posted by: Fuzzball | November 07, 2007 at 08:48 PM
Back when I had a car, and a reason to drive myself around, I listened to music like that all the time. I'd find random places and just pull over and listen to music. I miss it, a little bit.
Posted by: jessi | November 09, 2007 at 01:52 AM
i have driven miles longer than necessary to extend those moments! even found myself approaching the Cascade foothills once. yikes.
Posted by: iheartthirty | November 10, 2007 at 06:41 PM